Good reasons/excuses NOT to use version/source control

Version control is a tool to manage the changes to documents, programs, and other information stored as computer files. It allow us to track what changes we did, revert the changes, do modifications and much more. Many people still have excuses for not using version control, I have listed some of them which I have encountered them saying:

• I'm the only developer in my company, I don't need version control.
• What the hell is that thing?
• I have the ability to manage what version control does.
• I am incapable of making mistakes. Version control is only for those people who think they commit mistakes.
• I am not able to find any version control system which can work on my platform.
• I will not give my laptop to anyone, ever. So why do I need it?
• Version control can keep a permanent track of every bug I will make. I am not a good programmer. I don't want anyone to track my bugs.
• I'm too lazy to learn how to use it.
• I don't care if I lose my project; it is only for my personal use.
• My code is badly structured and full of bugs. So it doesn't make any sense to version it.
• I hate my company and want to see them fall.
• I don't want to leave any evidence.
• I want to show my company how bad I am.
• Web is my version control. If I lose anything I will google it and can find it anything.
• I can track the changes from my back up faster than anyone can retrieve it from version control.
• In this world there should be only one version of code and that should be on my machine only.
• I never commit mistakes and in near future even I will maintain this talent.
• I don't want to waste my time leaning version control. I know the value of time.
• I'm severely busy in rewriting my code which I deleted accidentally.
• I know I am the best programmer in the world, I don't need it.
• If I have the version control my boss will see my mistakes and will fire me.